ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
