I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
