Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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