singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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