Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
