with your own penis?
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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