dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
