her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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