I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
