The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
