ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
