WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
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