i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
