I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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