Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Randomize
