so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize