I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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