Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
