I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
