you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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