After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
i think i have herpe
just one?
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Randomize
