It's like God shit irony all over that family
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Randomize
