I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i can't believe i had my finger in that
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
