I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
