Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
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