thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
