Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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