I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
