I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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