You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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