O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
