y did u give ur computer a hand job?
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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