Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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