And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
