the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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