She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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