How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize