this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
They are going to name an STD after you.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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