I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Randomize
