He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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