i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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