She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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