So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
