Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
