Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
