i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
