she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Princesses don't give blow jobs
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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