i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize