Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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