he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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