Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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